As one woman sits in the doctor's office hearing the news that she has a new little life growing inside her, the woman in the next room is learning there will never be a little life growing inside her. Such different stories, but life will change for both of them. Some might say that the one woman is receiving the better news, that she will be having a precious little one, but at this juncture in my life, I'm going to say that the other one is receiving the better news. No, I'm not saying that having a hysterectomy is way better than having a baby! Or, am I? You see, we tried for 9 years to conceive and were unable to, but God still keeps his promises and we have a son and will have a daughter that we can completely call our own when the time is right. I only gave birth to the boy (what a 13 hour pain that was!) but the girl was born in our hearts. It's a different kind of birth, one that has a special joy all it's own. Both are super special events and completely life changing. But, that isn't what I want to talk about today. What I want to talk about is why we've chosen the path that we have for my body... (I really don't know a more delicate way to put that!) I made the appointment with the doctor to tell him that we're choosing to completely end our chances of ever having any more "natural or birth" children. We decided this all our own. I'm going to get a little graphic here, so if you're weak and can't handle talking about a female reproductive system, then STOP READING NOW! lol I promise it won't be too bad and I'll be as gentle with my words as I can! To start with I learned today that I'm not normal. Shocking, huh? I was describing my "normal" monthly situation to the doctor and he stopped me to tell me that it wasn't normal. Well, it's been my normal for many, many years! You see, it's a very painful time of month for me, but I get the opportunity to showcase more than one of my awesome outfits in one day! What a way to keep up with my wardrobe! Many of you already know the issues I had with the pre-cancer cells that were causing issues with conception as well. So, we got rid of that set but lately I've had some issues with the possibility of them having returned. Because of that we made the decision to ask the doctor what our steps would be to assure us that I would not get cancer of that type. That's when he said the "H" word. My first thought...."I'm not old enough to be talking about this!" and my second "I wonder if this would help me feel better." Of course, I realize I AM old enough and yes, it probably would help me feel better! I am fully aware that this will not fix every issue I have in my life nor will it be easy to deal with when the time comes, and I know that it demolishes the chances of me ever having another "natural" child, but I'm ok with this decision. I'm happy we made this decision. Actually, I'm excited about this decision and the opportunity it holds for me, a better me. So, while each of the ladies in the doctor's office today were hearing different news, both were happy news for each of the women. Unfortunately this isn't the case for all women hearing the news I got today. Please, take a moment to pray for someone you know who's going through this. Their world might be shattering before them, but we know that God is great and has the best possible plan for our lives. He is the one who has guided me through this and has helped me see the light.
Now, as an added bonus, I want to thank every one of you who has prayed for us through this journey. Not every step has been as exciting as some, but it's been worth it, that much I'm sure of! We still have a long journey through the adoption process of our little princess, but that is more than worth it as well! God has truly blessed us beyond measure! Until it gets a little closer to adoption time, I'm not sure I'll be writing much, but I promise I WILL write about that!
Have a blessed day!